Using Behavioural Styles as a Middle Manager

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Let me tell you about a story about a middle manager I coached recently on Behavioural Styles. He was a successful middle manager but had one major problem. His problem was the fact that he was often frustrated by certain members of his team. It wasn’t major frustrations, it was the small niggly things. He didn’t often let his frustrations show but these small niggly things could at times mount up and when they mounted up he could ‘snap’ and become aggressive. He was a go-getter/director. He was fast paced and wanted things done quickly. He had certain goals and there were times he felt he wasn’t getting the best from his team. Two people on his team were a bit more relaxed than him. They took their time on certain tasks often pondering over the process and making sure they completed the task accurately, being perfectionists. This was fine most of the time, but when there were very strict deadlines, the manager got really frustrated. When I was coaching him, the ‘penny dropped’. He realised these 2 people were Thinkers/Examiners/Analysts and needed perfection. They needed to know all the information and they took their time. In understanding this, he realised it was their behaviour and not their personality and that he wasn’t going to change them. He realized he had to give them more time and give them a simpler checklist so they weren’t caught up in the detail. In changing his thought process, his frustrations stopped. He became more patient and he understood what made them tick.


Being a middle manager is really difficult. Not only do you need to understand your team, but also your managers. If you understand behavioural styles, you will be able to connect with people on all levels more effectively. You will be able to adapt to their behaviour and won’t be as frustrated. If you want to know more, give me a call or email me. I will be able to coach you and your teams on Behavioural Styles so you can connect. I use on-line assessments where not only do you fill in the assessment, your observers do too. If it were just you who filled in the assessment, you would only get your perception of yourself. In getting the observers to fill it in, you get other people’s perception. We are not one behaviour entirely. We are different intensities of the 4 behaviours. I we inderstand when we change our behaviour and when other people act in a certain behaviour we can adapt to their needs.

To find out more, I can come in and train your whole team on Behavioural Styles  or you could attend my next open workshop on 27th February 2018.  Knowing Behavioural Styles is very powerful and helps you connect with people, whether you work with them, they are a potential client or a current client. Call me so we can discuss how I can help your team build relationships to build your business.

The power of giving keynotes

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I want to tell you a story about the most successful keynote I’ve given. I was asked to do a keynote on listening, a topic I had never done before. It was for an institute body and the businesses were businesses I had never worked with before. Since it was all new to me, I worked hard on making sure the audience would be happy with the content. I made sure it was specific to their needs and I spoke from the heart telling them relatable stories to enhance their understanding. The keynote was for 1 hour so I also made it interactive – giving them a couple of activities to do and talk to others. It ended up being one of my most successful keynotes I have ever given. My call to action made people want to come and talk to me and want to work with me.


From this I have learnt 3 tips:

1)    Think about a topic you would like to talk on. Make sure you are passionate about it. Make sure you present the topic in a way that will help the audience.

2)    Think about the audience you could give the keynote to and make sure they are the people who fit in with your ideal client, your target market and you can relate to them. When presenting the keynote, give them thought provoking information that they can take-away. They want take-aways and actions.

3)    Make sure you have a strong “Call to action.” You want to engage with them in the future, so make them want to speak to you.


Have you planned your keynotes for 2018? Have you put keynotes into your 2018 marketing strategy? If not you should, giving a keynote can be a very powerful tool for your marketing strategy. 


If you need someone to do a creative, interactive keynote, give me a call or email me. I will write a keynote for your specific needs, get the audience laughing, hit their ‘hot buttons’ and make them feel motivated.

Start Planning 2018 Now for Success



Where do you want to be in a year’s time? How successful do you want to be? It’s now November and if you don’t start planning NOW, success will not happen.


How many of you have reviewed your goals from January for this year and achieved them all? If you haven’t reviewed them, do it now! If you have reviewed them, did you achieve your goals? If not, why not? What I often find with my clients is that they have loads of dreams but they set goals which are vague and unrealistic. When setting goals, you need to be very specific and make sure they are realistic. You also need to keep on track, setting yourself milestones.


The time of year when most people set goals is New Years Eve. This is too late. You should start planning now, as you need to change your mindset as well as address the practical elements to achieve goals. It takes time.


One of my clients came to me and said she felt like a failure. She had set goals for the last few years, both personally and for her business, and she had never achieved any of them. When we looked at her goals we found they were not realistic, and if they’re not realistic, they are not motivating so they are hard to achieve. We worked on making sure her goals were very specific and realistic. This meant that she was more motivated to achieve them. We set out a timeline and she realised the exact time when she gave up on her goals. She had always started off fine, but lost her momentum halfway through the year. I then kept her on track throughout the year and a year later, her goals were achieved. Now, 5 years later, she has achieved much more and been successful.


I can coach you and your teams on setting goals for next year, and also achieving them. Call me now to discuss your blocks and why you have not achieved your goals in the past and we can plan how to help you with achieving your goals for success.

Listening is the key to building relationships

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When I’m training and I start the listening section, I usually ask, “hands up if you’re a good listener.” There’s usually at least one comedian in the group who replies, “Pardon?” Very funny. I always laugh. Then I state a fact, that this person is talking about hearing and hearing is different to listening because listening is a skill that can be developed and hearing is a physical ability.


Listening is the basis of building relationships. If you are a good listener, people will enjoy talking to you and will want to tell you information. Having information in business gives you power. If you refer to Behavioural Styles, you will understand what I mean by socialiser. I’m a natural socialiser, so I naturally love to talk. Over the years, I have learnt the skill of listening more. I have had to stop myself when I have wanted to talk and told myself to listen. It has taken time, as habits take a long time to break, and I have reaped the benefits, especially with my clients.


Let me tell you a story of working with one client. I was managing a team and this client was actually dealing with someone in my team. I had a feeling the person in my team was missing opportunities, so I decided to listen to her call with the client. I realised the person in my team was talking too much, and not listening to opportunities, as they were desperate to put across what they had to offer. I knew the client too, and decided I would call the client. I found out within 5 minutes that the person in my team had missed 3 opportunities with the client, just because they didn’t listen and talked too much. I then coached my team member on listening and letting the client talk and we had a bit of a joke going, that every call they had to evaluate their listening and if they interrupted they would owe me £1. The bad habit changed very quickly and the person in my team became very successful. One small change, to listen more and not interrupt, lead to success.


If you build positive relationships with clients, you are going to be more successful. I can help you and your team do this strategically. Relationships don’t just happen, you need to work on them. Call me today if you need more help in ways to build relationships so I can talk to you about the best ways to coach or train you and your team to build relationships. They will then have success in building their business.


To find out more, I can come in and train your whole team on Behavioural Styles  or you could attend my next open workshop on 27th February 2018.  Knowing Behavioural Styles is very powerful and helps you connect with people, whether you work with them, they are a potential client or a current client. Call me so we can discuss how I can help your team build relationships to build your business.

The Power of Questioning to build rapport when Networking



Have you ever walked away from a conversation while networking and thought, “that person knows nothing about me, so I’m not really interested in developing a relationship and helping them.”


When you go networking, one of your objectives should be to help others so that they with then want to help you in return. At networking, I see so many people trying to sell to the room but it’s not about selling to the room, it is about proving you are a competent person to deal with so that they want to refer you.


One way to prove your competence is by finding out about others. One of the most basic skills when communicating is questioning, yet it’s a skill that people find difficult. Questioning is a powerful tool and helps build rapport. It will also help you gain more information about people so you can help them. If you help others, they are naturally going to want to help you.


When communicating, try to ask questions that will get the other person talking. I find this is the best way to start a conversation, and it will make the conversation flow. When you want to confirm things, ask more direct questions. Then when you want to close the sale or the conversation, ask closed question. This is called the ‘questioning funnel’. You should have many ‘questioning funnels’ in a conversation depending on the type of response you are encouraging.


If you want to learn more about communication skills, especially questioning and in the networking environment, contact me and I can help you with all levels of communication from questioning right through to Behavioural Styles. Communication is a way to build relationships and if you build relationships, you are going to build your business so it is successful.

If you give, you will receive


When is the time of year that most people think about giving? The first thing that comes to my mind is Christmas. Yes, you may be cynical and think that some people only think about the presents they will be receiving at Christmas rather than giving, but as I have matured, I’ve thought more about giving than receiving. This should be the same in business. If you give, you are more likely to receive. It doesn’t have to be a gift either, giving is part of building a relationship, and people will want to give to you more if you give to them.

A great example of this is a lady who was the Training Manager of a large corporation. We got on well but then she got made redundant. Instead of thinking that she was of no use anymore, I went for a coffee with her and gave her advice on the types of roles she may like to apply for. I also helped her with interview skills since she hadn’t been for an interview in a long time. Because I gave her my time, she wanted to help me in return and so referred me on to two companies that needed help with their training.

Think of the ways that you can give to your clients, the people in your team and ex colleagues. You never know, one day they may be able to give back to you.

I coach and train people on building relationships and I work strategically with my clients to think of ways they can build relationships. If you build strong relationships, you will naturally build your business. Giving to others is one of the ways you can build strong relationships.

If you would like to know more about how I can help your organisation, call me today and I can come and meet you to see how I can specifically help you.


Collaboration for Success - Use Your Competitors


Collaboration. What does this word mean? To collaborate is to work together to achieve your goals.


When I first worked in recruitment, my manager treated our competitors as if they were the enemy. I was unable to speak to any competitors that I saw at events or conferences as my manager would tell me not to talk to them, despite how lovely some of those people were!


Years later, I ended up being headhunted by a competitor. I was petrified about starting work there as, to me, it felt like I was working for the ‘enemy’. When I go networking, I meet my competitors all the time but often, when I speak to them, I realise we are not in direct competition with each other at all. We can actually help each other. I’ve often asked competitors for advice and have also worked with competitors on projects together.


Something I have learnt in business is that you can’t do everything yourself, you need to get a team together to help you achieve your goals and your competitors can be the first point of call. You or they may end up getting a project that is too big, therefore help on that project would be very beneficial.


I also have an accountant collaborate with me – it would take me too long to do my VAT and tax so I need a specialist. I have a web designer, a social media expert, a photographer, videographer, an email marketer, the list goes on. If you think about how much you are worth per hour, then work out the cost of you doing it, and the cost of getting a specialist to do it, more often than not it will be cheaper to get a specialist to do it. Collaboration will save you time, so in the long run will save you money.



You may want to collaborate with a trainer to help your teams in sales and communication. If so, why don’t you collaborate with me? I can coach, train and mentor individually and in groups and using my skills will save you time. Contact me and we can discuss how I can help you and your teams be motivated and successful.

There is No scarcity. Desperation will not get you Sales


Were you ever so desperate to be best friends with the most popular kid in your school that you would do some really silly things to get their attention? You’d try everything and anything to impress them but it didn’t happen because you were trying to force a friendship.


Similarly, when trying to build your business, if you try too hard to impress people it may seem like you are forcing the situation, ultimately making you look desperate. An example of this is networking. Many people perceive networking as trying to get a quick sale, but networking is not a ‘quick fix’, it’s about nurturing and building relationships. If you appear too pushy you’ll likely scare people off, so try to relax and remember that sales will come if you strategically plan how to build a relationship rather than force one.


If you’re forcing sales, your mindset might be that there is scarcity. When I was first in sales, myself and my director were very competitive. She always wanted me to be the best and beat our competitors. However, one thing I’ve learnt while having my own business is that there is no scarcity. If I don’t win business then it obviously wasn’t for me.


I’ve also realised that I don’t want to win every single business out there. Some clients just don’t suit me, and I don’t have time to work with every single business. Before I even attempt to get a client on board, I qualify them and decide if I want to work with them. There is no scarcity. If one business doesn’t suit me then it’s on to the next one. Have confidence in what you do and only work with those you want to work with. Remember don’t be desperate, you will come across as pushy and turn people off.



For more information on how to build your business with the right people, I can coach and train you the skills so you are not desperate. Contact me and we can discuss how I can help you and your teams in your business.



Growing Your Business



One thing I was never taught at university was that when I went into the workforce I would need to grow my business in order to be successful. Many people in business treat the word sales as a dirty word but I prefer to think we are building relationships rather than making a sale. If you can grow effective relationships with your clients you will grow your business naturally.


Building relationships takes time and you need a clear strategy and a structure. You should regularly do relationship building activities with your clients and candidates so they can refer you. The most effective way of doing this is to work out who is likely to refer you to your target market, then strategise the relationship building activities you will do with these people, and be sincere with them. If you don’t have a target market, you should. This will give you focus and make it easier to find clients.


The most effective activities are done in person. We often hide behind social media and emails but stronger relationships will develop if you meet with people. Always have a goal in mind when you are contacting people. You don’t want to be seen as a time waster.


An example of a relationship building activity is to take someone out to lunch to thank them for a referral. This luncheon could then turn into a meeting, and you would be amazed at the information you could get from each other. Most meetings I’ve had like this have turned into business. This is just a simple example and I have plenty more techniques to help you grow your business.


To make sure you get on track, and grow your business, call me to discuss your problems, then I can come in and coach and train your team so they grow their client base more effectively. 

Communicating your Why, Not your What

Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?

Do you ever remember your mother asking you on many occasions why you did what you did? If you were like me you likely froze and thought “I don’t know”. As a child, this word was used as a negative but if you want to build your business you need to turn this around and use this word as a positive. “Why” is such a powerful word! When you’re talking to potential clients, current clients, colleagues, anyone to do with your business, if you explain why you’re doing something, you will get their BUY IN.

I want to give you a practical example. You are a team leader and your director has just told you there’s going to be a huge change to the usual processes and  that this is going to take a long time to change. If you go to your team and just state the facts about the change, will you get their buy in? NO! If you state why the changes are happening and how it will benefit you all in the long run, you WILL get their buy in. In every aspect of life, always think of the Why, not the What.

Think about your business and think about all the things you do in your business and what you have to offer. If you go to a meeting and tell a potential client all of these things, you’re probably going to bore them. On the other hand, if you go to the meeting and tell them why you are so passionate about what you do, why you love working with people like them and why you have been so successful, you will get their buy in so much quicker.

Not only do you need to understand your why, but you need to communicate it and practice it. Practice makes perfect. Think of different scenarios and practice them as if you are speaking to your clients. Imagine the clients saying, “so what?” to help you communicate your why more effectively.

If you’re confused and don’t know what your why is then I’m here to help. I can coach or train you and your team on firstly finding out their why and then how to communicate it. Why is powerful. Use it in every aspect of your business, especially when you are trying to attract more business.

Contact me to find out more.

How to Use LinkedIn to Understand People's Behavioural Style before you meet them.


The most common question I get asked when I train and coach Behavioural Styles is, “How do I find out their Behavioural Style if I’ve never even met them before?” My answer is always the same - Social media! You’ve got so many tools with Social Media that you don’t need to do any sort of questionnaire beforehand to find out a person’s behavioural style. It’s amazing what you can pick up on their LinkedIn profile.


If you have been on my behavioural styles workshop, you’ll know that you can understand someone’s behavioural style by what they are wearing and what they are saying. If they are very smartly dressed for example, very businesslike with a very businesslike hairstyle which makes them look like they mean business, they’re probably a Director. As a result, a Director’s LinkedIn profile would be to-the-point and their language would be based around their success and achievements.


If the person has very bright makeup with fun hair and clothes, they’re probably a Socialiser. They tend to use use excitable words with loads of exclamation marks!!!! They may even sound like they’re shouting.


If the person is wearing neutral, sensible colours they are probably a Relator. They tend to be very sincere in their profile, using caring words, often showing how they relate to people.


If the person’s clothes are good quality and their hair is perfect, they may be a Thinker. They will have a very detailed profile and use a lot of words, showing their expertise in what they do. They will have a lot of information and expand on it.


You may be a bit confused by this. We are all a mixture of these 4 Behavioural Styles, and it can be difficult to know how to communicate with each person due to the intensities of the behaviour. Some people have a very high intensity of one Behavioural Style, but we all have different mixtures of all 4 behaviours.


To find out more, I can come in and train your whole team on Behavioural Styles using The Platinum Rule Assessment by Dr Tony Alessandra, or you could attend my next open workshop on 28th March. This will be my last open workshop, after that I can come in and train your team. Knowing Behavioural Styles is very powerful and helps you connect with people, whether you work with them, they are a potential client or a current client. Call me so we can discuss how I can help your team build relationships to build your business

Adapt to People to Build Relationships


Have you ever received a gift and thought, “that person doesn’t know me at all!” Imagine if you were a teetotaller and one of your best friends bought you a case of wine for your birthday, or you were allergic to milk and were given a beautiful box of chocolates. Adapting to people is one of the main ways to build a relationship. Not only when giving a gift but when you are communicating with them too. Behavioural Styles is one of the most powerful tools I have used to understand people, and how to communicate more effectively to adapt to them and build a relationship.


Dr Tony Alessandra bases his work on Behavioural Styles around his quote, “treat people the way they want to be treated.” I believe this in every aspect of my life. If I am having friends over to dinner, I think about what food they would like and what they would enjoy drinking. If a chocolate lover is coming to dinner for example, I will make one of my ‘famous’ chocolate mud cakes.


How can we use this in business? If I’m emailing someone, I think about their behavioural style and adapt the email for them. For some people, I will be more chatty and use excitable words, for others I will be more to the point, using short, sharp words. And others very detailed and explain every step. In a client meeting, some people want a long icebreaker and introduction, getting ‘warmed up’ before the questions come. Then when you are questioning them, you need to be very considerate and calm. Others want the meeting to be quick, to the point, noting the actions. Others will ask you question after question after question.


All of these quirky ways are not personal, they are their behaviour. If we adapt to people’s behaviour we will build a stronger relationship, people will remember us and we will be able to build our business because we are gaining more sales quicker.

Share Your Vision and Goals

Imagine if in 5 year’s time you have been on that amazing holiday to Mexico that you have always dreamt of? Are you somebody who has always ‘dreamt’, but your vision has never come to fruition? Do you want to go through life saying,   “If only I had done that….”


My suggestion is that you SHARE YOUR VISION AND GOALS. It sounds so easy….. In reality it can be difficult. People often say to me, “I couldn’t tell anyone about that as it will never happen.” If you say it will never happen, it WILL NEVER happen. In sharing your vision and goals, you are putting yourself out there, you are letting people know you are serious. You are committing to achieve that dream you have always wanted.


You may be asking, “Who can I share them with?” There are plenty of people. Start with your friends and family. One of my annual activities over the Christmas break with my family is for each of us to create a vision board. We get loads of coloured felt tips, as well as google search photos and create our vision board on A3 paper, then laminate it. It is then used throughout the year for our placemats at meals. In September, my 7 year old son read his out and said, “Mummy, I have not scored a goal in football yet and I’ve got it on my vision board.” Guess what, the next week he scored a goal.


For your business goals, you may be in a mastermind group, or have a business coach you can share your goals with or you may have a business buddy, or a colleague at work. In sharing your goals, you are committing, and then you will see the goal evolve.


You might be asking, why is it important to have a vision?


If you have a vision you have something to aim for. In having something to aim for you will have more success, be more efficient, have fun and build better relationships so you can build your business, and achieve what you want in your personal life. Don’t go through life being a ‘gunner’ where you’re ’gunner do this and gunner do that’. Be a ‘doer’. Write down your vision and goals and go for it! Achieve them and be proud of it.


Claudia Fragapane is an Inspiration to Entrepreneurs and Business Owners


Are there times in your business where you lack confidence and motivation to get to the next level? As a business owner, I know I have these moments. Claudia would have felt this in her gymnastics career, but would be especially feeling this each week on Strictly Come Dancing. She is way out of her comfort zone. Claudia has learnt a completely new skill than what she has been doing for so many years in the gym, and has risen above the challenges. She may be a pocket rocket in the gym…..dancing is so different.


Think of Claudia when you have a low point and believe you cannot achieve your next goal. Claudia oozes confidence without being precocious. She doesn’t care about her size, and has achieved so much in learning a completely new skill which is out of her comfort zone, showing determination and drive. Something all business owners need.


Support Claudia Fragapane – what an inspiration. 

Its Not too Late to Set Goals for 2017

How are you going with setting your goals for 2017? “But it’s only November!” I hear you say. Last year I fell into the trap of not thinking about my goals until January. I’d set myself short-term goals, but hadn’t thought about my vision and exact goals until January. I should have started thinking about them in November so that I was ready to hit the ground running from January.


What are the benefits of setting your goals now? The biggest benefit is that you can visualise your year ahead. Think about painting a picture. What do you want to achieve in your year? What are your dreams? Think about your personal life as well as your business. Think about your health as well as your family. Think about your finances too. They all interrelate and effect one another.


An activity I do with my children and husband every December is to create a vision board. We get a large piece of paper each and draw a big mindmap with pictures and lots of colours. We then laminate it and use this as our placemats for the dinner table throughout the year so we’re reminded of our vision and goals. It is not only a great exercise to help each of us focus, but it also helps us communicate what each other is thinking. I remember my biggest dream when I was younger was to go travelling. If I had communicated this better to my mother I wouldn’t have upset her when I told her I wanted to ‘fly from the nest’. It is an amazing way to fully understand what your children and partner are all thinking.


To find out more about how to create a vision, set goals in 2017, I can come and coach your team in a safe, comfortable environment that is conducive for learning.



Have Vision, Set Goals and Change Lives.....

This year, I have based my year around a YouTube video that I watched in January on Sir Nicolas Winton. I’d heard about him before but I hadn’t put what he did into context. Recently, we were fortunate enough to have a lovely lady from the Czech Republic stay with us and we realised that friends of ours would not be here today if it wasn’t for Sir Nicolas Winton. I looked into more detail about what he had done and realised how much a simple goal of his effected so many people’s lives. In one of the YouTube video’s I watched the reporter asked, “do you realise you now have 50,000 grandchildren from the 669 children you saved?” he humbly said, “What a responsibility.”


The goals we set in our life can effect so many people. I decided that my goals for 2016 were going to be goals based around helping people build relationships in their businesses and in effect could change their life. My biggest aim was to get into more businesses and organisations and work with them to build relationships so they could achieve their vision.


If you set realistic goals that relate to your dream, you will be changing lives. My dream is that people in life understand each other more, thus working more effectively with each other and building deeper relationships so they can be successful, more efficient and have fun.


Let’s start now. If you start to think about the goals you want to achieve in 2017 then you’re one step closer to fulfilling your dream. The most important thing to remember when setting goals is to make sure you achieve them. It’s no use coming back a year later and feeling like you’ve been defeated. Set your goals from the heart and you will strive more to achieve them.


To find out more about how to create a vision, set goals and change lives I can come and coach your team in a safe, comfortable environment that is conducive for learning.



The most important part of communication is about hearing what is NOT being said

 As a child, when arguing with one of my siblings, in an attempt to resolve things my mother would ask, what was said? This frustrated me because it wasnt just the words being communicated that caused the argument, it was the gestures and the tone of voice.


Communication involves much more than just words, so in order to understand the full message we have to look deeper at the gestures and tone of voice as well. As a result, building rapport is essential and enables us to fully connect and understand what the other person is saying. It is much more difficult to portray the true meaning of conversation if we are not actually in the conversation ourself.


Hearing is an ability, but listening is a skill, and listening is more than just listening to the words, it is listening to the meaning as well. Often the meaning is underlined about what is NOT being said and so we need to take into account more than just words and look at the whole communication to fully interpret the true meaning.


When my husband asks me whats wrong? I respond to him nothing. This can be interpreted in many different ways depending on body language and tone. When listening and communicating we have to look deeper than nothing and look at the whole meaning, particularly about what is NOT being said. By asking more questions, we can get to the true meaning. So next time a friend, colleague or your partner responds to you with nothing, try to clarify what the real meaning is.


 Once you truly know about people, you will succeed at work and in life. To find out more about how to build relationships both personally and professionally to build your business, I can come and coach your team in a safe, comfortable environment that is conducive for learning.

Build Relationships to Build Relationships

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One thing I will never forget about my father when I was growing up was the way he communicated with people. He was amazing. He always got to the level of the person and related to them no matter who they were.


I remember watching him from one day to the next and remembering that he was incredible when he spoke to anyone. I remember one day in particular. In the morning he spoke to the poshest person I had ever seen. He related to them so well and really connected with them. Then that very same afternoon, he spoke to someone who looked like they didn’t have 2 pennies to rub together. He also connected with them and made them feel like they were the only person in the world. He was amazing at building relationships with every individual, no matter who they were, making them feel unique.


From this I realise that building relationships is so powerful. Building relationships will lead to success and getting the job done in an efficient way so people trust you and want to work with you. If you connect with people, they will want to be with you and they will therefore want to work with you. Just thinking about the bottom line does not lead to success in the long term. Think about the long term.


Recently, I have had 2 past clients who have come back to me after working with them 7 years ago. In that time I have moved to Australia and moved back. I believe this is because I spent quality time working on the relationship with them. When I met up with them again, it felt like I had just worked with them yesterday. It came down to the fact that I had built a strong relationship with them from the beginning.


 “Once you truly know about people, you will succeed at work and in life.” To find out more about how to build relationships more both personally and professionally to build your business, I can come and coach your team in a safe, comfortable environment that is conducive for learning.


Behavioural Styles can help your Influence in Meetings


Meetings, meetings, meetings….are you having meetings for the sake of meetings? Are you getting the results you want from meetings? Are you getting actions that are followed up and completed after meetings?


When I was growing up my mother always taught me to treat everyone the way I would expect to be treated. Yes, this is a good ethic to have, but does it work when you are trying to influence others in meetings?  People need to be treated the way they want to be treated. They need to feel comfortable with you, like you and trust you, so that you can influence the outcome you want in meetings.


Have you ever attended a meeting and thought, “this is a waste of my time”. There was no agenda, no objective, no outcome and no actions. I felt like every time I opened my mouth, I was talked over. No-one was interested in a positive outcome for the meeting. Why was I there?”


When I attend a meeting, I like to look at the agenda and plan before the meeting. I think about the people attending and what I will need to discuss with them in the meeting. I also think about what they want to get out of the meeting, how they are going to react to decisions and how I could influence them.


Meetings can be a waste of time if we do not communicate well in them. Adjusting the way you communicate depending on the other person’s behavioural style will help you in meetings. Some people may want to get to the point and only think about results. On the other hand, if you are someone who is more interested in the person and the long term relationship, you will need to adjust the words you use, otherwise they will switch off.


Who wants to ever come out of a meeting feeling like it was a waste of time? Not me. With effective communication, solid actions and using influence your meetings can always be productive.

“Once you truly know about people, you will succeed at work and in life.” 

To find out more about how to influence others more effectively in meetings, I can come and coach your team in a safe, comfortable environment that is conducive for learning.



Do you know what behavioural style you are? Here's a quick test......

Growing up my brother wound me up. I didn’t get him. He thought things through in detail, he was very serious about everything. He worked to systems, even having a strict system to completing his homework. He didn’t enjoy socializing, having very few friends and was serious in everything he did. He was very closed, not open. I found this kind of strange as a child, not understanding him.

If I knew then what I know now, I would have worked him out when we were very young. We are exact opposites in our behaviours and so we went about things in completely different ways. Here’s a quick test:

Are you fast paced or slower paced? Do you have many projects on the go, trying to get lots of things done quickly? Or are you more precise, more structured and slower paced in your thinking?

Are you open or closed? Do you focus on getting the job done, the detail of what you are doing, and how you are going to complete it? Or are you interested in the person and how they will feel?

We are the way we are. We can’t change this. Some of us go about things at a very fast pace, juggling many things. Others are extremely measured, thinking things through. Some of us are very open and all about the people, who they are, what they feel. Others are more closed, more serious about the job at hand and how to achieve results, being focused and completing it with a checklist. 

So the 4 categories are:

  1. Faster paced – Closed - Director*

  2. Faster paced – Open - Socialiser*

  3. Slower paced – Open - Relater*

  4. Slower paced – Closed - Thinker*


We also have a bit of each in us, having different intensities of the behaviour.


“Once you truly know about people, you will succeed at work and in life.”

To find out more about how to build relationships with people, understanding how they behave, I can come and coach your team in a safe, comfortable environment that is conducive for learning. We will initially complete a detailed Behavioural Styles assessment, detailing who you are and how you behave. Then we can work together to achieve goals to work more effectively with people.

* Words taken from The Platinum Rule - a registered trademark of Dr Tony Alessandra used with permission